Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Hiatus

The greatest thing you can do is ask someone about their day. I will elaborate more, but I need to attend some business first.

Yes, today is Wednesday, and yes, today I should post a new comic, but instead I am announcing a hiatus. Just as I was about to divulge in an intricate plotline, I ran out of punchlines. I do not know how long this will be, but I sincerely apologize to the small amount of fans I had. I hope this does not reflect poorly on my performance, and that you continue to read when I am able to come back to the world of webcomics.

As to why I'm taking a break is a personal reason, and in short, life is far too stressful for me to function properly let alone write a few jokes for the world. Laugh at you own jokes, and laugh at yourself, because if you can't do that for yourself, you can't do it for anyone else.

I'm writing this at 1:30pm in OpenOffice because for the last year I've never paid for internet and have relied on parking outside a McDonald's, or using my school's computers to upload content. For 8 months, I was sitting in my windowsill using my neighbor's unsecured wifi to check my facebook and do homework. No, I could not shell out money to pay for internet. As a matter of fact, for most of my schooling, I was without foodstamps surviving on the scraps from the leftover tables at school. Luckily, I qualified for foodstamps and started feeding myself, and everyone who gave me food.

I started doing webcomics as entertainment, a gift to the world. I was in a dark place,and times are drawing darker as the new year begins, school is ending, my loans, bills, and everything stack up, and in 32 work hours I am expected to find a new job and support everything. I do not know how I will pay rent next month, and I do not know what this means for my roommate, who moved in a couple of weeks ago for the first time. To her, I apologize profusely. At least we will be fed from the foodstamps. Now, I cannot give my gift to the world: a little laghter.

Life wasn't easy. I have no parents alive to ask for money, and my sisters are in the same situation I'm in. One helped me a year ago, but her helping me has brought her no good luck. I apologize to her, and say that I cannot afford to help her, as my last paycheck will soon come.

I came to Portland, Oregon (no, I am no longer afraid of anyone coming to “gang bang” me as threatened in some e-mails received a year ago, so my location is no consequence. If you still want me dead, you know who you are, I'm not afraid of you. After all I've been through, you are the amoeba in the ocean of my life.) I drove my ass up here, I paid for my rent, and I made it a year. I couldn't have done it without the help of my friends and family. To all those who helped, I love you all so much I can't even put it in words. To all those who have been hurt along the way, there are no words I can say to apologize enough.

To go back to my thesis, asking someone about their day, it really is the nicest thing you can ever do. Day in and out I've had shitty days, and all I wanted on those days was someone to look me in the eye and ask what was wrong. I had been starving for a week, nothing in my fridge but some barbecue sauce and jam, nothing in my pantry but crumbs, and having to listen to everyone in culinary school talk about how dinner with their parents last night was wonderful, hearing my teachers say “we can all afford to eat healthier, organic food,” and having to hear someone say “Well the cakes at Red Robin were probably frozen last night, but they tasted okay, I guess.” The hardest part was having to hear everyone tell me to “suck it up, they don't know your story.” Well maybe if they asked they would know.

A couple of weeks ago, the advisor pastry chef at my work was having a bad day, so I asked him what was wrong. He needed to vent, and I realized that sometimes all people need to do is talk. This lead to my current predicament. Everyone in the bakery was at risk for losing their job. All of the staff was so close, like a family. Well luckily, people got transferred, some got demoted, but we got a new advisor. My job ends in 32 work hours because of my “lack of experience” despite already working there. It's a long complex situation, I don't expect any of you readers to really comprehend what I'm saying at this point. I do, however, want to thank the few of you who ARE reading this. Just knowing you took a few seconds to read this is about as good as asking how my day was as I'll get from an stranger.

So, reader, I ask you how your day was, how your year was, and raise an imaginary glass to a new year. I apologize for the venting, but now you know why Dr. McPsychoBunny is on hold. Again, I apologize and hope to bring it back as soon as possible. Have a lovely day everyone, and if your day is going terribly, I hope it improves.

Sincerely,

CeramicBullet (Megan)

3 comments:

  1. Hi Megan! I appreciate you sharing your story! I can relate to many items you personally shared. Thank you for sharing your journey for me to read. I have a couple immediate ideas for on-call or more work for you if you are interested. It is foodie related, but not glamorous. Happy to be of support any way I can.

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    1. Any help at all is well more than appreciated! Thank you so very much for offering to help! I'm not gonna be in the next class, but if you can reply at x.ceramic.bullet@gmail.com i would much appreciate it!

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  2. I can relate to a lot of what you're saying grrrl. Don't hesitate to ask for help, a lot of us are in similar unsteady and rocking boats, but too shy to come out to others about it.

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